Thursday, October 23, 2008

ESPN Should be Blown Up

It’s amazing that no one is talking about it, but I will spill the beans. ESPN’s staff is clairvoyant. It’s true. Why just today Wendi Nix broke the story that the New England Patriots, the same organization that responds with "we have to look into that" to the question "is grass green", are upset about Tom Brady’s choice of doctor to perform surgery on his knee.

But let’s not give Nix all the credit. Remember 5 years ago when Lawyer Malloy, the Pats Pro-Bowl safety and team captain, was cut 5 days prior to the start of the 2003 season, and Tom Jackson said that the players in the Pats’ locker room "hated" Bill Belichick. Well he sure was right. The players were so pissed that they decided to go out and win consecutive Super Bowls. Oooo, that showed the Hoodie whose boss didn't it Mr. Jackson? Where did this "knowledge" come from? Did you use a magic 8 ball? Did it come to you in a dream? Did the divots in John Clayton’s face spell out a message for you?

So while ESPN would not at first cover the Brett Favre story, despite it being broken and substantiated by Fox Sports and other media outlets, they had no problem covering the alleged Rams walk-through tape based on "an unnamed source". Huh, so while you could ride the back of the Herald on the Walsh story and the additional surgeries needed by Brady, Fox Sports is not good enough?

So what’s the lesson in all this? If you have never worked in the media, are uneducated and unemployed, then all you need to do is head down to ESPN with a brick-red crayon to fill out an application and you too can make up stories. (editors note:Milwaukee's is currently attending anger management with Larry Johnson)

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